It only took me 25 years to catch on.
"And 'don’t sin by letting anger control you.' Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry, for anger gives a foothold to the devil. ... Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior. Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you." Eph. 4:26-27, 31-32
How about you? Do you find yourself at the ready to defend even if you're not under attack? How many arguments could be avoided if we sought to extend grace rather than dig our heels in?